


After You

by euniche95



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Car Accidents, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-17
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-15 00:47:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29427636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/euniche95/pseuds/euniche95
Summary: A get-together with Inarizaki's volleyball alumnus. Everyone is here, having fun together. But one.
Relationships: Kita Shinsuke/Miya Atsumu
Comments: 4
Kudos: 12





	After You

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first time I tried to write for boys x boys and lately Atsukita was on my mind like a lot so I want to write about them, so please enjoy! Ah, I got the idea while listening to Dahl-After Ours, please try to listen to it while reading this :D

A get-together with Inarizaki's volleyball alumnus. Everyone is here, having fun together. But one. Kita Shinsuke look at his glass full of beer, with an empty gaze. Having no appetite and interest to socialize with everyone. 

"Shin! Yo, I thought you're not going to show up again like last year." Akagi waving his hand and sit beside Kita. Kita reply him with a light nod and a fake smile. "Are you already here for a long time?" Kita just shake his head. Akagi sighs, "It's been 5 years, Shin. Did you still thinking about him? About Atsumu?" Hearing his ex lover name makes Kita shed some tears. Akagi startled by Kita's crying and the sound is getting louder. Kita showing emotions in front other people is not weird anymore, but ever since Miya Atsumu gone, his emotions got carried away with him too. Kita shut everyone down, never showed up at reunion and blocked everyone's number. Inarizaki's 3rd year squad Aran, Akagi, and Omimi also included in Kita's blocked list. He become a different person after Miya Atsumu passed away.

"You're not drunk, right Shin?"

"No, I'm sober. I never touched any alcohol, Michinari. He never liked it. My drunken state, he hates it. I always become clingy to everyone and he couldn't bear to see me like that. He always accompany me every time I go to a bar with my friends. Even in bar, he always order a mocktail for me. People saw it as obsession but I liked it a lot. I, too only want to show my other side to him, only him. His passionate self, whether about volleyball or about our personal life, I admired him for it. His caring side, whenever he has to leave me alone at apartment, he always make sure that our apartment secured and I feel safe because of it. His surprises, one day he said he will trained for Olympic in span of 3 months, away from Hyogo. From here, I can only pray for his safety, I hope he won't have any injury or anything bad. But suddenly I heard the bell rang, he stood right there in front of me while bringing a bucket full of flower and smiling. _Happy 3rd anniversary_ , he said. Even when he busy, he remembered. I didn't prepare anything for him that day, he was the one who showers me with love." Kita stopped, taking a breath. Akagi still listen closely to his friend's story.

"I've tried my best to replace him in my heart, I brought someone new to our apartment but his image still wandering inside my head. I still remember his face, his smile, his voice, his touch, his smell, and everything that reminds me of him. I still remember our last phone calls. That day we fought because I knew he wasn't keeping his healthy self and getting stressed of his new serves, he fell sick at dorm when no one can take care of him because everyone was busy. Hinata was the one who tattle it to me. He already apologize but I still have some anger left. He decided to go back to Hyogo, to see me and saying apology right to my face. Riding on a night bus but ..." Kita begin crying again, Akagi quickly asking for a tissue to the waiter. 

"You know the rest." The bus had brake failure and got into an accident. 3 people dead including Atsumu. "His last call, he said that he love me. That was the last time I heard him saying it and I didn't reply to what he said. In the morning I feel perfectly fine, working help me cop with this grief however at night, I feel worse. I feel like there is a hole inside of me. Looking at our cold and empty apartment, only bring misery to myself. How am I supposed to live on when I can only think about him? He set the bar too high, so I couldn't help myself to find another one who can fill everything which he left behind and I haven't found anyone better than him."

Akagi couldn't form any words to counsel Kita. Akagi know deep down Kita still thinking that he was the one who is responsible for Atsumu's death but everyone knows that he wasn't the one at fault. "Michinari, you probably thinking that I blame myself for the accident right? Yeah, I was thinking of that too but it was already pass beyond me now. So rest assured, I wasn’t thinking about those thing anymore. Right now what I think the most is how to live a normal life again. Finding a new love again, after him. I know people have different personality, just like you and me, even Atsumu and Osamu, they are twins and they're somehow different. But, the way Atsumu taught me love .. that's what I seek the most.”

Kita stand up from his seat, taps Akagi’s shoulder lightly, “I’ll go home first. I haven’t found the others but tell them I said hi. Thank you for listening to my rambling, Michinari.” Kita is leaving Akagi behind, opening the door and walk away from the restaurant. Kita inhales the cold air outside, rubbing his hand together to warm himself. He forgot to bring his cotton gloves, _Atsumu will scold me over this thing_. “Kita-san! Wait!” Kita hears a familiar voice, “I want to give you this.” Osamu stands before him smiling and handing him a pair of gloves with a fox pattern.

“How..”

“Atsumu left a long ass message to me about you. Including this. He said you tend to forget about gloves on winter day. So he told me to bring them if I ever met you. I rushed out here when I heard Akagi-san talking about you who just went home. By the way, how are you Kita-san? It’s been so long since the last time we talked. 5 years ago, right?” Kita gives Osamu a bitter smile. Kita wasn’t the only one who feel sad when Atsumu left this world. Osamu must’ve felt the same way. Kita was too occupied with his own sadness and he couldn’t see Osamu’s. “5 years is not a short time, Kita-san. I know you miss him, because me too. However, the more you drown yourself in those wailing pit, you only make Atsumu to hate you more. He won’t feel at ease if you behave like this, Kita-san. I’m sorry if I sound rude but I know Atsumu will say the same thing when he saw your state right now. He won’t be mad if you continue to live on without him. Moving on is not a crime, Kita-san.”

Kita holds the gloves tight to his chest, listening to Osamu’s words made him realize his foolishness. “Thank you Osamu.” His mouth could only say those 3 words. Osamu nods and left Kita with his thought. Suna was calling him to go back inside the restaurant.

The truth is Kita was afraid to forget about Atsumu. Having new relationship means making new memories with new person. New memories will piling up, buried old memories deep down inside him. Forgetting all the memories he has with Atsumu. Forgetting the sensation when he was with Atsumu because whether he liked it or not, he will start to get used to the new person. Kita was afraid. However, Osamu was right. Atsumu would never like this side of him who wail for Atsumu for over than 4 years. Kita is smiling to the thought of Atsumu scolding him because of this.

Then Kita let out a long sigh, start to wear the gloves which Osamu give him earlier. _Even I can’t meet you anymore, you still make sure that I’ll always stay safe, Tsumu. So, may I really move on from you? Having another lover, after you?_

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading this works >< I hope to write about them more sometime in the future, see you at the next works!


End file.
